Understanding When To Say ‘Gomel’
October, 2018
Someone calls the rav and proclaims, “Rav, I need to bentch gomel!”
The rav asks what happened.
“Well, my pants fell out of a three-story window”
The rav does not understand the significance of this event and inquiries, “Why would that obligate a bentching of gomel?”
The shoel is incredulous, “Because, rabbi, think about it: I could have been in them!!”
This is not to poke fun, chalila, rather to show that people desire to thank Hashem; to have something to say to express their gratitude whenever they see hashgacha pratis in their lives.
It is often the most difficult ‘No’ a rav has to sometimes pasken.
When asked gomel questions, more often than not, while always a fascinating and wonderful story of hasgacha pratis, it does not reach the level of requirement needed for this special beracha. In fact, so particular are the halachos as it relates to gomel, that often the answer will hinge upon if the questioner is an ashkanazi or a sefardi!
We are focusing this week on this issue for good reason.
B’chasdei Hashem, in hundreds of columns dedicated largely to life in rabbanus, I have had the occasion to discuss many issues that touched upon halacha. The research that goes into every source of such discussions is, of course, scrupulous. But what the reader may not know is the painstaking focus of the editors on every sentence, as it should be. Every word is weighed, as Ami recognizes how even a comma can make all the difference.
Baruch Hashem, it pays off.
Once an article that happens to touch upon halacha goes to print, I receive wonderful correspondence from poskim and talmidei chachamim. The mareh makamos that they share, and the friendships formed through this space, has been priceless, and a tremendous zechus.
So it was with some regret that a recent column –whose focus was ironically not halacha –led, I believe, to some confusion. Indeed, I have heard from several readers asking for some clarification.
In a story about ‘positive perspective’, I mentioned something that I witnessed –a woman bentching gomel due to what others would consider negative events in her life. To protect her identity – and so as to not touch upon sensitive matters – I did not get into some of the specific details of her illness, rather I focused on what she decided to share about her experience; specifically, how she framed a summer of horror into a summer of Thanksgiving.
In particular, many readers contacted me asking if a sakana that might have come, but did not, would be enough to make this beracha. To be sure, and as we shall see, most poskim would not require a gomel in such a case.
Nevertheless, an elucidation into this fascinating topic is now apt.
Much of our teffilos are replacements for korbonos. Gomel is no exception. While the beis hamikdosh stood, one would offer a korban todah to thank Hashem when saved from a dire situation, and gomel comes to replace this korban todah (see shu’t Chasam Sofer oh’c 51 who explains the limits of this comparison between the todah and gomel).
In fact, the Chasam Sofer (ibid.) explains that it is for this reason that we strive to have this beracha be recited by an aliyah. In addition to being a time where a minyan present is guaranteed -as it is best to say this beracha with a minyan, although, if one knows that a minyan will not become available in the proper timeframe from the incident he may say it without a minyan, Mishneh Berrura 219:8 – the Magen Avraham teaches (siman 272) that an aliyah to the Torah is analogous in itself to the offering of a korban, making the todah/korban analogy complete.
Chasam Sofer goes on to explain that for this reason one should stand during the beracha, like by a korban. Others explain that the reason we are to stand is because gomel is similar to a hallel (Elyah Rabbah)!
While the korban todah was not an obligation per se -rather a mtzvah – there is a significant debate if gomel is indeed a full-on requirement or not (see end of shu’t Minchas Yitzchak 4:11 in detail).
However, the question that confounds most is just what is considered a dire situation that would obligate this beracha?
Rav Yehudah in the gemara (Berachos 54a) teaches that the pesukim in Tehillim ch. 104 allude to four categories: someone saved from sea, the desert, sickness and prison.
Sefardim generally follow a very strict fidelity to these categories, and would not make this beracha for any other type of danger –although sometimes the separate beracha for a ness would be required(‘…she’aseh li ness ba’makom hazeh’).
(NOTE: The beracha for a ness is a separate and complicated topic, as is its distinction from birchas gomel. The reader is directed to Piskei Teshuvos 218:10 for a wonderful treatment of this issue, and where he clearly explains the uniqueness of each of these beracha, and where hedifferentiates the circumstances behind each).
Although a lenient and limiting view, this sefardic approach does lead to stringencies, in that situations that do fall into the above four categories (say, traveling on the sea) would require a beracha even with minimal or no danger. Of course, a sefardi should speak to their rav, as these halachos, according to some, relate differently to modern ships and vessels.
Ashkanzim, on the hand, understand this Tehillim source to be non-descriptive, but rather comparative in nature, and that any real comparable danger would indeed require this beracha, for example a wall falling on someone, escaping a lion, certain incidents of being accosted by robbers at night (Shulchan Aruch siman 219:9, first view; see Igros Moshe 2:59)
In addition, while sefardim would make this beracha even by a more far-fetched sakana, ashkanazim make this beracha only when the sakana was at hand and not just a potential, save for the four actual categories mentioned in the pesukim where even ashkanezim may be required in a beracha although no sakana was apparent (see first Biur Halacha in siman 219; see the discussion in the poskim relating to gomel and plane travel, e.g. Igros Moshe ibid, Halichos Shlomo 23:5, Minchas Yitzchak 2:47, Tzitz Eliezar 11:14, Teshuvos V’Hanhagos 1:193, inter alia).
As for which type of illness recovered from would require this beracha, every case is different and one should speak to a competent rav after any surgery or recovery from serious physical or mental illness and episodes.
Because it is a sensitive moment when I tell someone that their story, while mesmerizing, does not fall under the rubric necessitating this beracha, I recommend that they read the pesukim of the korban todah, this way they feel that they are offering something as a way of giving thanks (see Shulchan Aruch Harav, basra, 1:9).
To end, let us note that gomel has something in common with a bris mila, in that they both require a response from the kehilla witnessing these acts. By a bris chazal tell us to respond to the other’s mitzvah by proclaiming “kshem sheninchnas la’bris ken yikaness…”, and by gomel the Shulchan Aruch rules that are we are to respond to another’s beracha with “mi sh’gemalcha kol tov…”.
Perhaps the connection is the tethering of hishtadlus and bitachon. We all need to do our part to serve Hashem, and bris mila is the most public reminder of that ideal, but at the same time must be cognizant that at the end of the day it is hakadosh baruch hu on Whom we all need to rely.
Let us continue to respond to these moments, surrender to Halacha when it is not their time and place, and await the arrival of moshiach when the beracha Sheheciyanu (along with five or so other berachos) will be said.
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